August 23, 2024

Dear TrailMark Residents,

As we all know, the past two weeks have been a bumpy roller coaster ride with the changing out of our trash and recycle cans. Please know that your volunteer HOA Board has been just as frustrated as many of you with all of these Republic trash and recycle changes. The word CONFUSED best describes what we’ve all been through on this Republic toter swap for TrailMark.

On August 20th, our Board worked cooperatively with Republic Services and asked that they post a letter on their stationary in an attempt to clarify our issues. After reading Republic’s August 20th document, there were some additional questions emailed to the Board. We’d like to answer these questions before our next upcoming trash/recycle day on August 27th.

To lighten up the topic, and give all of us a dose of laughter in a time of stressful trash and recycle can talk, the Board created a funny Republic Trash Q&A quiz below of the most current trash/recycle bin questions. We hope the multiple choice options will make you giggle and give you some much needed humor.

Please note that the “CORRECT” answers are the very last answers in BOLD RED ITALIC.

QUESTION #1:
On August 27th, can I still use my non-Republic, also known as homeowner-owned trash/recycle bin for disposing trash and/or recycling?

A. Why not, I’ve used this can for 19 years.

B. Duh, the trash company picks up every type of can – I’m not doing this change thing.

C. But Jerry’s sister’s aunt’s cousin on Facebook said I could.

D. YES, 8/27 IS THE VERY LAST DAY I CAN USE MY PERSONAL NON-REPUBLIC TRASH/RECYCLE CAN. ALL TRASH/RECYCLE CANS THAT ARE NOT BLUE REPUBLIC TRASH CANS WILL NOT BE EMPTIED AFTER 8/27.

QUESTION #2:
On August 27th, will Republic Services haul away my non-Republic, also known as homeowner-owned, trash/recycle can, whether or not I post a sign on it that says “REMOVE AS TRASH?“

A. Our trashman has taken everything we’ve always put out for 20 years – so heck yah!

B. The customer service agent at Republic said they would take it because my trash can stinks!

C. Bruh, why is this so difficult? It’s just a trash can.

D. SADLY NO. REPUBLIC STATED THIS WEEK THAT THEY WILL NOT HAUL AWAY ANY OTHER HOMEOWNER OWNED OR NON-REPUBLIC TRASH/RECYCLE CANS (INCLUDING GFL, ALPINE, HOME DEPOT, LOWES, OSCAR THE GROUCH STYLE, WASTE MANAGEMENT, ETC.) EVEN IF IT HAS A SIGN ON IT THAT SAYS “REMOVE AS TRASH.” REMEMBER, YOU CAN USE YOUR NON-REPUBLIC CANS ONE LAST TIME ON 8/27, BUT REPUBLIC WILL NOT HAUL THEM AWAY ON 8/27.

QUESTION #3:
How do I dispose of my old non-Republic trash/recycle can after trash day on 8/27?

A. Hope and pray that a really cool TrailMark hawk will fly down to my curb on 8/27 and fly it out of TrailMark for me.

B. Pray that there is such a thing as a trash/recycle can pirate thief.

C. Do nothing, the can will disappear on its own like all of my other precious garbage does when I put it at the curb.

D. DELIVER IT TO A FRIEND OR RELATIVE OUTSIDE OF TRAILMARK WHO NEEDS AN EXTRA CAN, CUT IT UP IN LOTS OF PIECES AND DISPOSE OF IT IN MY NEW BLUE COLORED REPUBLIC TRASH CAN, ADVERTISE IT ON MARKETPLACE OR CRAIGSLIST, DISPOSE OF IT AT MY PLACE OF WORK, DONATE IT TO GOODWILL OR ARC, KEEP IT AS A WHITE ELEPHANT GIFT FOR CHRISTMAS, HAUL IT TO THE DUMP, OR KEEP IT AS AN EXTRA STORAGE CONTAINER IN MY GARAGE.

QUESTION #4:
How do I get the “optional” extra trash can that Republic Services is offering?

A. Just call and/or email Republic Services every single day until it shows up at my house.

B. Just call and/or email all of the HOA Board Members every single day until it shows up at my house.

C. Just call and/or email Westwind Management every single day until it shows up at my house.

D. Ask all my friends on Facebook because there’s never misinformation on Facebook.

E. CLICK ON THIS LINK, https://forms.office.com/r/RS1GkvzrPd AND FILL OUT THIS FORM IN IT’S ENTIRETY PRIOR TO SEPTEMBER 16TH. THE BOARD WILL BE ANNOUNCING THE DAY OF THE OPTIONAL EXTRA TRASH CAN DELIVERY ONCE THEY HEAR BACK FROM REPUBLIC WITH THE REQUESTED TOTERS NEEDED.

QUESTION #5:
Fall is coming and I will have a lot of extra yard waste. Can I put all 14 trash bags on the street and use extra non-Republic trash cans to get rid of all my yard waste during that time?

A. Sure, I’m the guy with 14 black trash bags on my street on Tuesday morning with no leaves in my back yard, CHAMPION.

B. But every fall we’ve always been able to do this – like what changed?

C. OMG, I just got home from work and the trash guys didn’t pick up my 14 bags of leaves – do I need to paint the trash bags blue?

D. PLEASE FOLLOW OUR TRAILMARK TRASH POLICY, https://www.trailmark.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/hoa_trashpolicy_20190711.pdf. FOR EXAMPLE, IF YOUR HOUSEHOLD RAKES UP 14 BAGS OF LEAVES IN THE FALL, KEEP YOUR BAGS OF LEAVES IN EITHER THE GARAGE OR BACK YARD AND PERIODICALLY FILL YOUR NEW REPUBLIC TRASH CAN WITH THE BAGS OF LEAVES EACH WEEK UNTIL THEY ARE ALL GONE. ALSO ASK FELLOW NEIGHBORS IF YOU CAN ADD A BAG OF TRASH INTO THEIR CANS IF THEIR CANS AREN’T COMPLETELY FULL. DO THIS PRACTICE UNTIL YOUR BAGS OF LEAVES DISAPPEAR. ALL BAGS OF TRASH LEFT ON THE GROUND ON TRASH DAYS WILL NOT BE PICKED UP, PER OUR TRAILMARK TRASH POLICY. REMEMBER, ONLY TRASH AND/OR RECYCLING IN REPUBLIC MARKED CANS WILL BE PICKED UP STARTING SEPTEMBER 4TH (OUR DELAYED TRASH DAY AFTER LABOR DAY).

Hopefully, this satire clears up some confusion for everyone and made you smile. Remember, a spoonful of laughter is the best medicine for all of us. Enjoy your weekend and come relax at our final Concert in the Park on Sunday the 25th of August at 5:30 p.m.